So, here are the schools I'm applying to first:
1. University of Chicago
2. University of Illinois at Urbana-
Champaign (dual-degree program)
3. Loyola University
4. NYU
5. Boston College
6. Boston University
7. UC Berkley (maybe)
All this stressing out about application deadlines and scoring well on the GRE is going to get to me eventually.
Also, what about school?
And my music?
*sigh*
Time goes bye so quickly...
On the plus side: Angela and I have a new family member: Simon the Kitten.
AND
Will is moving here in 3 WEEKS!
Life isn't so bad. =) =) =)
September 23, 2007
May 11, 2007
May 08, 2007
Who would have thought...
Secrets I've decided to reveal today:
1. Sometimes... I eat at McDonalds.
2. I'm not a Huskers fan...
3. I confess... I watch American Idol.
4. The best concert i've ever been to was last year's Sigur Ros concert... (maybe this isn't so secret)
5. When no one is around I like to tap-dance in the kitchen to loud rock music... and it's bad for the floor.
Don't tell... =P
So... I was in the middle of writing my theology paper this morning, when I got a phone call from a local radio station who wants to do a radio interview with me, and possibly a tv spot... Scared the HECK out of me! lol. Apparently the station heard of my music through a press release at my school. I'm still in a little bit of shock... Its not everyday that I wake up and have a member of the local media ask for an interview! Infact... its never happened. So yeah, i'm really excited and quite a bit nervous...
In other news... School is almost out!
I'm really sad to see some of my senior friends go, especially Julie... I'll miss her a lot. Its been a long time since I've written here... its been a long time since i've written anything besides religion papers... its strange to think that i'll be a senior in college next year. I feel like i'm ready, infact i'm pretty excited. But the thing that is strange to consider is all the people here that I don't feel like I know very well. When I leave i'm going to miss the people I wish I knew well... Know what I mean?
Its always been difficult for me to put myself out there, and I wish I knew exactly why. I think mostly its because I spend too much time being shy... Ah well, i'm learning slowly. One of my good friends once told me that before she knew me she thought that I was stuck-up, and further, that I was mean... hehe. This was before we had ever spoken of course, but still I thought it was odd, and it makes me wonder whether or not my shyness comes off as disinterest or something else to some people. Usually when I meet someone that i'm really interested in i'm pretty reserved, even though I don't intend to be... hmmm... Well whatever the reason, I'm don't think i'm the only one who does this.
I've been thinking a lot about music lately, and what direction I want it to take. Sometimes I think that my songwriting would improve if I had one or two other people to collaborate with. I also want to give the new songs more depth, and I think i'm getting there, but the songs i've recorded so far don't really show the same depth and reality that the newer ones do. I'm hoping that this summer I can record the newer ones... Also, I want to learn how to play the mandolin...=P.
we'll see....
1. Sometimes... I eat at McDonalds.
2. I'm not a Huskers fan...
3. I confess... I watch American Idol.
4. The best concert i've ever been to was last year's Sigur Ros concert... (maybe this isn't so secret)
5. When no one is around I like to tap-dance in the kitchen to loud rock music... and it's bad for the floor.
Don't tell... =P
So... I was in the middle of writing my theology paper this morning, when I got a phone call from a local radio station who wants to do a radio interview with me, and possibly a tv spot... Scared the HECK out of me! lol. Apparently the station heard of my music through a press release at my school. I'm still in a little bit of shock... Its not everyday that I wake up and have a member of the local media ask for an interview! Infact... its never happened. So yeah, i'm really excited and quite a bit nervous...
In other news... School is almost out!
I'm really sad to see some of my senior friends go, especially Julie... I'll miss her a lot. Its been a long time since I've written here... its been a long time since i've written anything besides religion papers... its strange to think that i'll be a senior in college next year. I feel like i'm ready, infact i'm pretty excited. But the thing that is strange to consider is all the people here that I don't feel like I know very well. When I leave i'm going to miss the people I wish I knew well... Know what I mean?
Its always been difficult for me to put myself out there, and I wish I knew exactly why. I think mostly its because I spend too much time being shy... Ah well, i'm learning slowly. One of my good friends once told me that before she knew me she thought that I was stuck-up, and further, that I was mean... hehe. This was before we had ever spoken of course, but still I thought it was odd, and it makes me wonder whether or not my shyness comes off as disinterest or something else to some people. Usually when I meet someone that i'm really interested in i'm pretty reserved, even though I don't intend to be... hmmm... Well whatever the reason, I'm don't think i'm the only one who does this.
I've been thinking a lot about music lately, and what direction I want it to take. Sometimes I think that my songwriting would improve if I had one or two other people to collaborate with. I also want to give the new songs more depth, and I think i'm getting there, but the songs i've recorded so far don't really show the same depth and reality that the newer ones do. I'm hoping that this summer I can record the newer ones... Also, I want to learn how to play the mandolin...=P.
we'll see....
April 18, 2007
aaa(AAAAH!)aaaaapathetic
I've been feeling a little discouraged today.
But perhaps that's the natural thing to happen when work is testing the limits of your thinking... School is hard this semester, and today I think maybe I've just let my guard down.
The first thing that happened was that I got my second test back in my bible class, and for the first time in any class in my major, I got a C on a test. The grade will go nicely with the grade I recieved on my first reflection paper, which was basically worse... I'm not sure what's going on in this class, especially since I've never gotten grades like these, and I still don't feel like i've gotten a sufficient explanation as to why these grades are so low... But anyways, ranting aside, I really thought that I didn't let it bother me initially, but maybe subconsciously it took its toll.
There were other things that I think have felt like little pricks today too. Really small insignificant things like Martina McBride singing: "You can love someone with all you heart for all the right reasons, and in a moment they can choose to walk away... love 'em anyway." and reading an assignment for my Buddhism class that talks about Zen Buddhist Monks who are leaders of their sanghas having numerous illicit affairs with their students, and singing a song in choir today that is so profoundly beautiful that it nearly makes me cry every time we sing it (could be bad for the tour...). I also walked into work today and found my employer, who is one of the sweetest women I know, looking like she had been crying. And then, of course, when everything else seems to be sinking my spirits for the day, I start to think about the future and how shakey and uncertain it seems...
Then again, there are so many blessings in my life that I really have no reason to worry and complain and feel insecure...
*sigh*
Someone help me talk me out of this.
But perhaps that's the natural thing to happen when work is testing the limits of your thinking... School is hard this semester, and today I think maybe I've just let my guard down.
The first thing that happened was that I got my second test back in my bible class, and for the first time in any class in my major, I got a C on a test. The grade will go nicely with the grade I recieved on my first reflection paper, which was basically worse... I'm not sure what's going on in this class, especially since I've never gotten grades like these, and I still don't feel like i've gotten a sufficient explanation as to why these grades are so low... But anyways, ranting aside, I really thought that I didn't let it bother me initially, but maybe subconsciously it took its toll.
There were other things that I think have felt like little pricks today too. Really small insignificant things like Martina McBride singing: "You can love someone with all you heart for all the right reasons, and in a moment they can choose to walk away... love 'em anyway." and reading an assignment for my Buddhism class that talks about Zen Buddhist Monks who are leaders of their sanghas having numerous illicit affairs with their students, and singing a song in choir today that is so profoundly beautiful that it nearly makes me cry every time we sing it (could be bad for the tour...). I also walked into work today and found my employer, who is one of the sweetest women I know, looking like she had been crying. And then, of course, when everything else seems to be sinking my spirits for the day, I start to think about the future and how shakey and uncertain it seems...
Then again, there are so many blessings in my life that I really have no reason to worry and complain and feel insecure...
*sigh*
Someone help me talk me out of this.
February 28, 2007
1. Honestly, what color is your underwear?
kind-of a dark earthy rainbow pattern.... it sounds wierd, I know.
2. Honestly, what’s on your mind?
How bitter-sweet life is.
3. Honestly, what are you doing right now?
typing answers to the questions you are asking me.
4. Honestly, do you think you are attractive?
I guess. but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
5. Honestly, have you done something bad today?
um... not that I can think of.
6. Honestly, do you watch Disney channel?
I might if I had it...
7. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?
no one immediately comes to mind
8. Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
The people I love most.
9. Honestly, do you bite your nails?
No. the thought terrifies me... which I never realized until just now.
10. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder?
nope
11. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment!
Will
12. Honestly, do you have a deep dark secret?
Yes. but there are a few who know it.
13. Honestly, do you have a friend you don't actually like?
Why would i call someone I don't like, a "friend"?... I can't really think of anyone I really really don't like...
14. Honestly, are you a good friend?
I hope so.
15. Honestly, are you in denial?
I might be, but i'll only know once I realize it... hehe.
16. Honestly, who would you wanna be with right now?
um.. I already told you, but i'll say it again.
WILL.
17. Honestly, do you like someone?
gee... I dunno...
More Emotions
*Anger Section*
1. What do you do when you're mad?
Cry
2. What's the worst thing you've done when you were mad?
hmm... I've said things that I regret before.
*Crying Section*
1. Honestly, when was the last time you cried?
Yesterday
2. Ever cried yourself to sleep?
Yes. actually last night I did
3. Do certain songs make you cry?
Yes.
4. What usually makes you cry?
Hormones... hehe. mostly kidding. Thinking about the past and the future.
*Happy Section*
1. What can make you happy?
People. Always people.
2. Does being with your friends make you happy?
Yes
*Self-Esteem Section*
1. Do you believe in yourself?
I do, but sometimes I gang up on myself.
2. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, what do you do?
Blush and try to take the compliment and not reject it.
3. Are you one of those people that think they are ugly, dumb, or gross?
haha. well not consistently, so no.
EIGHT THINGS:
8. last cigarette: Never
7. last beverage: A glass of grape juice
6. last phone call: I talked to Will earlier
5. last movie you watched: Angela and I saw "Miss Potter" which was very sad, but good.
4. last REAL date: about 2 weeks ago when Will was here.
3. last BUBBLE bubble bath: I wish right now
2. last time you cried: Yesterday
1. last meal: Dinner
SEVEN have you's:
7. have you ever dated someone twice? Yes
6. have you ever been cheated on? Yes
5. have you ever kissed someone & regreted it? ummm.. I dont think so?
4. have you ever fallen in love? Yes
3. have you ever lost someone? Yes
2. have you ever been depressed? Probably
1. have you ever had a heartbreak? Yes
SIX things you did in the last three days
6. Went to school: hehe yes.
5. Went to work: YES!! In fact I got a job TODAY!
4. Colored: oh! that would be sweeeet!
3. Got drunk: Nein
2. Had sex: Nada
1. Hurt yourself: I fell over today. So yes.
List people you can trust with anything:
Will, Laura, Jackie
THIS YEAR...(starting in 07):
1. Fallen out of love? nope
2. Laughed until you cried? Yes. with Laura. =)
3. Met someone who changed your life? Yes.
4. Found out who your true friends were? not this year?
5. Who is the best hugger that you know? Will. But I could be biast....
6. Do you believe in love at first sight? Well.... I didn't before.... but now I wonder...
7. Is there something you want to tell someone? Always.
8. what kinda shirt are you wearing? Will's college shirt
9. whats the best party/night out you've been to/had this year? My birthday party.. =D
10. Best food you've eaten? mmmmm so much good foood.... The food Will and I cook when together
11. How many kids do you want to have? 1-3: probably 2.5.
12. Do you have a good relationship with your parent (s)? Mostly
13. Do you wanna change your name? Nah
14. What did you do for your last birthday? Will, Laura, and Jackie threw me a surprise birthday party at Cheesecake factory, and then we had karaoke night at BWW's. It was awesome.
15. What time did you wake up today? 10:30am and it was glorious.
16. What were you doing at midnight last night? crying.
17. Name something you CANNOT wait to do? See Will
18. Last time you saw your father? Christmas
19. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? I wish that Will and I lived closer.
20.Who would you punch right now? no one??
21.What are you listening to right now? Sigur Ros
22?
23. Have you ever donated money to a good cause? Yes, not enough yet though.
24. Have you ever talked about someone behind their back? Yes, and I'm not proud
25. Whos getting on your nerves right now? A couple people close to me, but I still love them.
26. Most over used phrase? "uuuh..."
27. Most visited website? prooobably facebook
28. What do you think the worst fashion trend right now is? anorexia?
29. Coke or Pepsi? Coke. no question
30. Have you kissed or been kissed by anyone in the past week? I wish....
31. Do you disagree with a lot of things going on in the world? Yes. don't get me started.
32. Do you think there's some models/people out there that should gain a couple pounds? um. duh.
33. Do you enjoy your friendship with your friends? Immensley
34.Who did u copy this from? Amy
35. What do you think of this person? She is great. =D
kind-of a dark earthy rainbow pattern.... it sounds wierd, I know.
2. Honestly, what’s on your mind?
How bitter-sweet life is.
3. Honestly, what are you doing right now?
typing answers to the questions you are asking me.
4. Honestly, do you think you are attractive?
I guess. but beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
5. Honestly, have you done something bad today?
um... not that I can think of.
6. Honestly, do you watch Disney channel?
I might if I had it...
7. Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now?
no one immediately comes to mind
8. Honestly, what makes you happy most of the time?
The people I love most.
9. Honestly, do you bite your nails?
No. the thought terrifies me... which I never realized until just now.
10. Honestly, have you had an eating disorder?
nope
11. Honestly, do you want to see someone this very moment!
Will
12. Honestly, do you have a deep dark secret?
Yes. but there are a few who know it.
13. Honestly, do you have a friend you don't actually like?
Why would i call someone I don't like, a "friend"?... I can't really think of anyone I really really don't like...
14. Honestly, are you a good friend?
I hope so.
15. Honestly, are you in denial?
I might be, but i'll only know once I realize it... hehe.
16. Honestly, who would you wanna be with right now?
um.. I already told you, but i'll say it again.
WILL.
17. Honestly, do you like someone?
gee... I dunno...
More Emotions
*Anger Section*
1. What do you do when you're mad?
Cry
2. What's the worst thing you've done when you were mad?
hmm... I've said things that I regret before.
*Crying Section*
1. Honestly, when was the last time you cried?
Yesterday
2. Ever cried yourself to sleep?
Yes. actually last night I did
3. Do certain songs make you cry?
Yes.
4. What usually makes you cry?
Hormones... hehe. mostly kidding. Thinking about the past and the future.
*Happy Section*
1. What can make you happy?
People. Always people.
2. Does being with your friends make you happy?
Yes
*Self-Esteem Section*
1. Do you believe in yourself?
I do, but sometimes I gang up on myself.
2. When people say they think you are good looking/pretty, what do you do?
Blush and try to take the compliment and not reject it.
3. Are you one of those people that think they are ugly, dumb, or gross?
haha. well not consistently, so no.
EIGHT THINGS:
8. last cigarette: Never
7. last beverage: A glass of grape juice
6. last phone call: I talked to Will earlier
5. last movie you watched: Angela and I saw "Miss Potter" which was very sad, but good.
4. last REAL date: about 2 weeks ago when Will was here.
3. last BUBBLE bubble bath: I wish right now
2. last time you cried: Yesterday
1. last meal: Dinner
SEVEN have you's:
7. have you ever dated someone twice? Yes
6. have you ever been cheated on? Yes
5. have you ever kissed someone & regreted it? ummm.. I dont think so?
4. have you ever fallen in love? Yes
3. have you ever lost someone? Yes
2. have you ever been depressed? Probably
1. have you ever had a heartbreak? Yes
SIX things you did in the last three days
6. Went to school: hehe yes.
5. Went to work: YES!! In fact I got a job TODAY!
4. Colored: oh! that would be sweeeet!
3. Got drunk: Nein
2. Had sex: Nada
1. Hurt yourself: I fell over today. So yes.
List people you can trust with anything:
Will, Laura, Jackie
THIS YEAR...(starting in 07):
1. Fallen out of love? nope
2. Laughed until you cried? Yes. with Laura. =)
3. Met someone who changed your life? Yes.
4. Found out who your true friends were? not this year?
5. Who is the best hugger that you know? Will. But I could be biast....
6. Do you believe in love at first sight? Well.... I didn't before.... but now I wonder...
7. Is there something you want to tell someone? Always.
8. what kinda shirt are you wearing? Will's college shirt
9. whats the best party/night out you've been to/had this year? My birthday party.. =D
10. Best food you've eaten? mmmmm so much good foood.... The food Will and I cook when together
11. How many kids do you want to have? 1-3: probably 2.5.
12. Do you have a good relationship with your parent (s)? Mostly
13. Do you wanna change your name? Nah
14. What did you do for your last birthday? Will, Laura, and Jackie threw me a surprise birthday party at Cheesecake factory, and then we had karaoke night at BWW's. It was awesome.
15. What time did you wake up today? 10:30am and it was glorious.
16. What were you doing at midnight last night? crying.
17. Name something you CANNOT wait to do? See Will
18. Last time you saw your father? Christmas
19. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? I wish that Will and I lived closer.
20.Who would you punch right now? no one??
21.What are you listening to right now? Sigur Ros
22?
23. Have you ever donated money to a good cause? Yes, not enough yet though.
24. Have you ever talked about someone behind their back? Yes, and I'm not proud
25. Whos getting on your nerves right now? A couple people close to me, but I still love them.
26. Most over used phrase? "uuuh..."
27. Most visited website? prooobably facebook
28. What do you think the worst fashion trend right now is? anorexia?
29. Coke or Pepsi? Coke. no question
30. Have you kissed or been kissed by anyone in the past week? I wish....
31. Do you disagree with a lot of things going on in the world? Yes. don't get me started.
32. Do you think there's some models/people out there that should gain a couple pounds? um. duh.
33. Do you enjoy your friendship with your friends? Immensley
34.Who did u copy this from? Amy
35. What do you think of this person? She is great. =D
February 19, 2007
February 13, 2007
| The Best Myspace Survey | |
| * . . About You . . * | |
| Eye Color:: | Blue-green |
| Hair Color:: | light brown |
| Height:: | 5'1" |
| Favorite Color:: | Blue & green |
| Screen Name:: | blukat8504 |
| Favorite Band:: | Vienna Teng... at the moment |
| Favorite Movie:: | too many... |
| Favorite Show:: | no idea |
| Your Car:: | lexus IS |
| Your Hometown:: | Durham, NC |
| Your Present Town:: | Grand Rapids, MI |
| Your Crushes First Name:: | Will |
| Your Grade:: | 15th... |
| Your Style:: | um... ?? |
| * . . Have You Ever . . * | |
| Sat on your rooftop?: | I wish |
| Kissed someone in the rain?: | yes. the pouring rain, actually. =) |
| Danced in a public place?: | yes |
| Smiled for no reason?: | regularly... |
| Laughed so hard you cried?: | yes |
| Peed your pants after age 8?: | oh probably. hehe. but its what all the cool kids do... |
| Written a song?: | yes, see the above. hehe |
| Sang to someone for no reason?: | well there's always a reason... =) |
| Performed on a stage?: | yes |
| Talked to someone you don't know?: | yes |
| Gone out of your way to befriend someone?: | yes |
| Made out in a theatre?: | yes |
| Gone roller skating since 8th grade?: | yes, last year in fact! |
| Been in love?: | yes |
| * . . Who was the last person to . . * | |
| Say HI to you?: | Kyla? |
| Tell you, I love you?: | Will |
| Kiss you?: | Will |
| Hug you?: | Cynthia |
| Tell you BYE?: | Kyla |
| Write you a note?: | Grace |
| Take your photo?: | hmmm... its been awhile |
| Call your cell phone?: | Will |
| Buy you something?: | Mom |
| Go with you to the movies?: | Will |
| Sing to you?: | Will |
| Write a poem about you?: | a poem about me? hmmm. I have no idea |
| Text message you?: | Sprint... |
| Touch you?: | Angela? |
| * . . What's the last . . * | |
| Time you laughed?: | a few minutes ago |
| Time you cried?: | maybe a week ago? |
| Movie you watched?: | Memoirs of a Geisha with my roommates |
| Joke you told?: | no idea. |
| Song you've sang?: | Momentum by Vienna Teng |
| Time you've looked at the clock?: | just now after reading this question |
| Drink you've had?: | i'm drinking hot chocolate that julie made me. =) |
| Number you've dialed?: | Will's |
| Book you've read?: | "what the Buddha taught" by Walpola |
| Food you've eaten?: | pasta with parmesian cheese |
| Flavor of gum chewed?: | um... mint? |
| Shoes you've worn?: | my black boots |
| Store you've been in?: | meijer |
| Thing you've said?: | "they could be on top in the back on the left side..." (I was telling Angela where her frozen dinners were. hehe) |
| * . . Can You . . * | |
| Write with both hands?: | I can barely read what I write with my right hand... no. |
| Whistle?: | yes |
| Blow a bubble?: | once in awhile |
| Roll your tounge in a circle?: | nope |
| Cross your eyes?: | no, but I can make them go in opposite directions.. hehe. its gross... |
| Touch your tounge to your nose?: | no. my tounge is stubby.... |
| Dance?: | yes |
| Gleek?: | gleek?? I've never heard this word... I must be old. |
| Stay up a whole night without sleep?: | yes. I do it often, its called "college" |
| Speak a different language?: | a little spanish. I can slowly read ancient Greek... |
| Impersonate someone?: | sometimes |
| Prank call people?: | no... I used to laugh too hard |
| Make a card pyramid?: | no. that would be cool though. |
| Cook anything?: | yesssss... I looove to cook. =) |
| * . . Finish The Line . . * | |
| If i were a ...: | writer |
| I wish ...: | I could fly |
| So many people don't know that ...: | there is hope. |
| I am ...: | most passionate about people and discerning truth in life |
| My heart is ...: | open |
| Take this survey | Find more surveys Bzoink - The Original Survey Site | |
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